you're gonna judge me for this.

sean.

sooooooooooooooo i was gonna go to this worship service thingy at school, but then someone asked if i wanted to watch the bachelor premiere with them. the right choice was pretty clear. the bachelor it was.

while waiting for it to start i had the realization that the bachelor and sister wives are basically the same show. #makeoutwitheverybody

i'm watching it with 15 other girls in my dorm and i we decided we should play a prediction game while we watched. we are writing down each of the bachelorettes names and then voting on who we think sean will give a rose to by raising our hands. this is sort of like taking those hearing tests where you raise your hand when you hear the sound. only better. if they got a rose, they are italicized. druuuummmmmmmm rooooollll pleaseeeee.

ashLee - personal organizer. 

votes: 8.

jacki - cosmetic lady.

votes: 2.

selma - real estate lady. also a magician because she pulled a tissue out of her bra. 

votes: 0.  

leslie - poker dealer? okay.

votes: 1.

daniella? 

votes: 0. awkward.

kelly - apparently a singer. a bad one. really forward too. i'm cry laughing. also a cruise ship entertainer.

votes: 7.

katie - yoga teacher.

votes: 2.

ashley p - avid fifty shades of gray reader. i feel uncomfortable. 

votes: "AHHHHHHHHHH!! NOOOOO"

taryn - health club manager.

votes: 7.

catherine - graphic designer

votes: 3.

robyn - not a gymnast

votes: 3.

lacey - grad student and tanner

votes: 5.

paige - jumbotron operator. i don't like her. 

votes: 7.

tierra - leasing consultant. also good at making first impressions. i can tell she is gonna go far. i can already see them making out in a hot tub.

votes: 10 that she would get the first impression rose. 

amanda - fit model. awkward. large mouth. can't. handle. it. 

votes: 0.

keriann - entrepenuer. aka. unemployed. also, know that you aren't gonna make it far if you say "a shot with you."

votes: 0.

desiree - bridal stylist. loves pennys and wishes. and designing her own wedding dress. 

votes: 7.

sarah - advertising designer. he asked "how are you?" like he was concerned her missing arm was causing her pain. 

votes: 7. he just wants to know about the arm.

brooke - community coordinator.

votes: none on account of her panther like behavior. like i think she growled.

diana - salon owner. "maybe we can just leave now. just you and me." denied. awkward.

votes: 8.

lesley m - political lady. i think. likes checking out people's forms.

votes: 6.

kristy - ford model. apparently ford is a modeling agency. she isn't a model for ford cars. umm. yeah.

votes: 7.

ashley h - fashion model.

votes: none.

lauren - journalist. creepy dad. "my dad wants you to know that if you break my heart he's gonna break your leg." .....awkward silence follows.

votes: no. just no.

our bride lindsay - substitue teacher. OMG THEY KISSED. WHAT IS THIS. THERE ARE NO RULES. "i have balls." - lindsay. "i hope not." - sean. el oh el this is the best. 

votes: 1. only mine. 

but wait, chris says there is another girl. 

commercial break suspense. and now i'm mad because i waited too long to go to my room and get goldfish. 

kacie b - occupation is apparently "ben's season." woah boobs. i mean he was pretty stoked to see her so like maybe thats a good sign? but everyone hates her because "she had her shot with ben so why does she think its gonna work with sean?" oh i don't know, maybe cause they are different people? also, totes not fair that they have met before. like not at alllllllll.

votes: 9. 

"nothing but good things will come." - sean.

yeah except for the 25 of you whose hearts he will break.

this show is increasingly awkward the more you think about it. like yaaaaa... lets have intimate conversations with a camera crew filming us. 

also, why does everything have to be a "game changer"

"i didn't think i was gonna be this nervous for the rose ceremony." please. 

prediction for the winner who sean will fall in love with and then break up with approximately 6 months after the finale: taryn. 

or desiree.

i'm so excited for this season. i haven't watched the bach in forever so it's going to be great. who do you think will win?

ko.